Suzy Home Wrecker

[slant6billy]

So after my day of driving hard on Eve, I'm out at the end of my driveway just before dinner getting in that oil change. I have the ramps on the driveway apron since the chin spoiler is way still too low. I've been known as the neighborhood wrench for cheap for a while. While filling the golden good stuff, another neighbor walks on over to see what's going on. This mid 30s chick already tanked one marriage and lives with a dude who drives a Prius. Ok he might be a tool and I might be decent with tools, but I don't crap where I eat or in this case where I live. So for all you youngins, take my advice it ain't worth the 5 seconds, 5 minutes, one night stand. Us older dudes only need like 3 seconds or 4 hours based on the warning on the pill bottle. This chic was asking to go for a ride or sit in the drivers seat. I know how my wife thinks and my Volare' would have been burned to the ground with me in it. So I was not buying what the chick was selling. Call me slow or a homo, but as grimy as I was and sticking of BO, there was no way that chic was in her right mind. Besides, my wife allows my other woman to be Eve- my Volare. I get to have a romp on Eve like a ho with chipped tooth. My Volare asks to be beat on. The best part, I share the keys..... so I'll be headed to the track the first Friday in June, if anyone wants sloppy seconds on my Volare.

 

[greymouser7]

billy you filthy, sexy beast

 

[Jack Meoff]

Lol....damn Billy you just reminded me of a similar old story.
I just started seriously dating my wife (21 years together now) and this neighborhood hottie from the hair salon down the strip comes walking up to me in a pair of Daisy Dukes and a relatively non existent tank top.....she's got a cappuccino in each hand....gives me a big smile and says "I can't get a quarter out of my shorts for the parking meter....can you help me out?" Two things to know....I'm not an idiot and I don't like fake boobs (or fake girls). I said "Sure" and I took one of the cappuccino's out of her hand. She gave me a dirty look and snatched the cappuccino back and stormed off....lol!!

Any guy I've ever known who talked about fooling around on his woman....I've told him the same thing. Go hit the bathroom bud....when your finished the urge will be too. Nobody's marriage is worth a half ou hour of cheap thrills.

Besides....I like shooting down homewreckers......it pisses them off. :laughing4:

 

[slant6billy]

I half blame the Floozy Suzy. There are a few mid 30s women walking around looking for another "man". In this one's case, she lives with a dude who can't do anything but sit a couch well and watch the Satellite Sports package channels and the cable network- yes he has both. His lazy ass has a ride on mower for a 1/5 of an acre. Reason I'm thrashing on this dude, is even the dumbest bimbo chick is not going to find that attractive. My wife dated a few mechanically declined type guys before me. So she has a great appreciation for the "handy type". Hell, even my wife's sister thought I was free labor and had a long list of things her house needed. My wife stepped in and said No after a few weeks to her own sister. My wife also told her sister to find her own Maintenance man. Her sister was real pissed too. the labor was free, neat, no strings attached and she like to watch me toil on that old house. I thought I was keeping the peace. My wife put a stop to free labor for relatives and thus the phone hardly rings. So my wife gets really pissed when any bimbo comes around while I'm in "the zone" of a project or showing my jack of all trades master of none skills. My wife and her sister never resolved that one on the free labor stuff. So imagine how my wife gets if she believes a bimbo is coming around for something a bit more seedy?

 

[Jack Meoff]

My wife is pretty laid back most of the time....
But if any gals get too friendly I can almost here this song start up.....

https://youtu.be/SmwVcD8OZwI

 

[Monkeyed]

I'm pretty oblivious when it comes to that kind of thing. At the video store I used to work at (remember those!) there was a group of four or five smokin' hot chicks that used to come in all the time, I'd always help them pick a movie, normal enough didn't think anything of it. One of my female co-workers mentioned to me after they left one day that they were mackin' on me, I was like,... what? she just looked at me and said "they don't come in here to check out the movies" I had not a clue. My wife had to practically hit me over the head with a hammer to let me know she was interested!